


Two Sides of the Same Coin

by detectivedeckerstar



Category: Lucifer (TV)
Genre: Angst, Established Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar, Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Lucifer (TV) Season/Series 05, Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV) Needs A Hug, Michael is a dick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-21
Updated: 2020-11-21
Packaged: 2021-03-05 02:27:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,165
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25376920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/detectivedeckerstar/pseuds/detectivedeckerstar
Summary: Takes place in presumed Season 5b, after the threat of Michael has been contained.Chloe asks Lucifer why he never mentioned Michael before, and Lucifer tells her of Michael's betrayal, and why he swore to never lie again.Spoiler Alert: it's kind of emotional.**Note: Originally written and published post-season 5 trailer but pre-season release. Reposting cuz it still holds up and we might be getting some Michael backstory/motivations in 5b and I'm theorizing.
Relationships: Chloe Decker & Lucifer Morningstar, Chloe Decker/Lucifer Morningstar, Lucifer & Michael, Lucifer & Michael (Lucifer), Mazikeen & Lucifer Morningstar (Lucifer TV)
Comments: 43
Kudos: 290





	Two Sides of the Same Coin

**Author's Note:**

> So I was pondering why Lucifer never mentioned Michael before and this was my idea for it! In true Lucifer fashion, he was in denial and shut it out to avoid dealing with it.  
> So this just in general takes place in Season 5b after Michael is dealt with.  
> I really liked writing this, and I really hope you like reading it! Please let me know what you think in the comments, I would love to hear your feedback!  
> Enjoy!

Lucifer and Chloe sat on the piano, leaning on each other, soaking up each other’s presence. While Lucifer had been back for a bit now, both of them remembered all too well the feeling of being without each other. It was not something they looked fondly on.

Chloe’s head laid on Lucifer's shoulder as he played the piano absentmindedly. Both of their eyes were closed, relishing in the casual feeling of each other and the sound of the beautiful music filling the penthouse. Neither were sure how long they had been there, and neither cared to check.

“Why did you never mention him?” Chloe asked a little while later.

She was, of course, referring to Michael. He had been taken care of and was no longer a threat, but Chloe was still a little frustrated that Lucifer had never mentioned him before. It could’ve saved them both a lot of pain. If she knew there was someone out there with his same face, maybe she wouldn’t have kissed Michael, thinking it was Lucifer, and that would’ve saved them both the hurt when she found out who she actually kissed.

Lucifer sighed as his fingers slowed on the keys.

He knew that she would ask this sooner or later, and he had been dreading answering it, because of what painful memories it would bring up. He wouldn’t lie (obviously) or evade the truth, she deserved to know. And he wanted to tell her, wanted to tell her everything about his life, but he was not looking forward to the feelings part of it. He much preferred to stay in denial, thank you very much.

“Well, the easy answer is because no one ever asked. I certainly never foresaw him coming to earth, so it didn’t seem relevant,” he replied.

“Yeah, but I thought the fact that you had an identical twin would come up,” Chloe reasoned, “I mean we worked a case about identical twins not too long before you left.”

Lucifer was silent for a moment.

“He has not been my twin, or even my brother, for a very long time,” he said quietly.

Chloe looked up at him in question, but stayed silent, knowing he would talk when he was ready.

Lucifer took a deep breath and scrunched his eyes shut.

“Michael and I were created from the same life force. Mother and Father had never created anything like us before and they never created any other angels like us again. Father called us twins, because we were two-in-one, created from the same life force but still separate. We looked relatively the same, but our personalities were polar opposites. We were not like human twins, where we were a copy of each other. We were a life force split in two, two sides of the same coin.”

Lucifer had fully stopped playing now, his eyes were staring out the windows of the penthouse, his gaze far away.

“We were practically inseparable in our first few years. I mean we practically completed each other, after all. We had a connection unlike any of our other siblings did. It was unexplainable really; we were just so in tune with each other at all times. Knew where the other was, what they were feeling and if they were injured. Our abilities were linked as well. Together we had what was called the demiurge. Michael had the power to create and I had the power to shape. Creation left unshaped is useless and disappears, and the ability to shape is useless without creation. It’s how we made the stars. He was always much more intellectual, came up with all the logistics like gravitational pulls and the heat they exuded. Whereas I was the visionary, the designer. Michael created the matter, I shaped and hung the stars, littering them across the galaxy.”

Chloe sat there, stunned. She had no idea he’d done that. That they'd created the stars.

She had refrained from googling or seeking information about Lucifer and his family’s past from anyone but the sources, considering the horrible experience they had _last time_ she outsourced for information. She remained silent, not wanting to disrupt him and lose all of the development he was making.

He’d created the stars?

“As we got older, our tasks were separated a little more, but we were still incredibly close. Something pretty spectacular would have to happen to separate two people created from the same life force, you’d think?” Lucifer said bitterly.

“Many, many years later, Father introduced us to the newest creation in the works: Humanity. Told us he created them in his own image and likeness, and that they would look similar to us, minus the angelic beauty and wings, and that they would have free will. Father wanted us to kneel for them, to serve them, but I refused. I wanted my own free will, _our_ own free will. Together, Michael and I could create whatever we wanted without Father, and we didn’t need him. So I rebelled. The first of God’s angels to go against Father’s words. I rallied others behind me to go against Father’s command to serve humans. I just wanted to be equal to them, to have free will as they were designed to have. Michael had promised me he was on my side, and that he agreed with me, and that he would face Father with me, so _we_ could have our freedom.”

Chloe could feel Lucifer getting more and more wound up, his anger simmering beneath the surface.

“But he lied,” Lucifer said coldly.

“When it came time to face Father, Michael betrayed me. Turns out he was on Father’s side the whole time, commanding his army. Should’ve seen it coming really, the name Michael literally means ‘Who is like God’,” Lucifer scoffed.

“I was so bloody confused and hurt by his betrayal, the battle was over soon. My last memories of the Silver City are at its edge, my wings bound, Michael’s sword under my chin and his foot hitting my chest, knocking me back, casting me into hell as Father commanded.”

Lucifer was quiet for a moment, his eyes scrunched shut in pain. Chloe squeezed his arm where she held it.

“I fell for an eternity. At least that’s what it felt like. It seemed endless. And then I finally landed. In hell. And it bloody _hurt_. I landed in a pool of flames, which is when I got my devil form. I was unable to move for centuries, continually getting burned by hellfire with no way to escape, my cursed immortality keeping me alive, suspending me in an endless loop of agony.”

Chloe was unable to keep the tears at bay as Lucifer told her of the pain and horror of his fall. Her heart was aching horribly in her chest.

“Until finally, a millennia later, a demon found me. She reached in and pulled me out, burning half of her face in the process. She told me she was called Mazikeen.”

Realization donned on Chloe. That suddenly explained the entirety of their relationship. Everything about their interactions and undying loyalty, no matter how many times they betrayed each other, made so much more sense knowing that piece of their history. Knowing the place of pain that it came from.

“After finally escaping the fires, my mind cleared from something other than agonizing pain, I felt it, or more accurately _didn’t_ feel it,” he said, his voice hollow.

“I couldn’t _feel_ Michael anymore. Our bond had been severed,” he said, his eyes falling shut at the reminder of the pain.

“Everything about my fall was painful. My Father casting me out, my Mother standing by idly, the look on my sibling's faces as I was bound and kicked, the fall, the landing, the flames.”

Lucifer sucked in a breath.

“But _nothing_ compared to what it felt to lose Michael. To lose half of myself. To feel so hollow in a place where another had existed. Nothing hurt worse than his betrayal and his lies.”

He spoke with such pain. Lucifer’s eyes stayed closed as tears spilled from his eyes, silently falling down his face. He sucked in a deep breath moments later.

“So I disassociated myself from them completely. Ditched the name Samael because I was no longer ‘of God’, introduced myself to Maze as Lucifer, after my light-bringer name. The one thing that was independently mine and no one else’s. I told Mazikeen about it all once, desperately needing someone else to know, and then I shut myself off from them completely. Never discussed it again.”

“I swore off lying, promised myself I would never lie, never cause another as much pain as his betrayal did, never hurt another by my deceit.”

Lucifer abruptly stood up, his fists clenched at his side, his eyes squeezed shut, tears still wet on his face.

“The day I felt the bond break was the day Michael stopped being my twin. My brother.”

Lucifer stalked out to the balcony, needing some fresh air because he felt like he couldn’t breathe.

Chloe sat there and watched him, still in shock. There was so much pain in his past and she just wanted to make it go away. She wanted to help him, but she didn’t know how. What could she possibly do the help with the pain he just told her about? And to think she was previously mad at him for not mentioning Michael before.

No fucking wonder he didn’t.

She got up less than a minute later and followed him out to the balcony.

He was leaning heavily against the rail on his forearms, his head hanging between his shoulders. Chloe approached him slowly so he could hear her footsteps. When she got closer, she opened her arms and wrapped them around his waist, placing her hands on his stomach and leaning her cheek against his back.

Lucifer tensed up for a moment like he usually did, but a moment later relaxed at the contact and let out a small sob.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered.

Lucifer turned around in her grasp and looked down at her confused.

“Sorry? What on earth are you sorry for?” he questioned.

Chloe looked up at him.

“I’m sorry that happened to you. You didn’t deserve that,” she replied.

Lucifer’s jaw hardened and he looked away for a second. Chloe immediately knew what he was thinking.

“You didn’t. None of it. You may think you do, but you did not deserve any of that pain,” she insisted.

Lucifer was silent for a moment, still not looking at her.

“You don’t know all the things I’ve done,” he muttered.

Chloe cut him off.

“It doesn’t matter. _No one_ deserves what was done to you, _least_ of all you.”

Lucifer closed his eyes.

“I’m a monster, Chloe,” he admitted, pulling back from her embrace.

Chloe’s heart broke. How could he see himself that way? After everything he had done for her, for their friends and for humanity? How could he think he was a monster?

She stepped forward and reached up, putting her hands on his cheeks, drawing his gaze back to hers.

“No you’re not. Not to me.”

Lucifer’s face slacked as he remembered the last time she said that to him. Before she knew.

Now she did know, and she still believed the same thing?

“ _Chloe_ ,” he sobbed.

Tears welled up in his eyes and they both leaned forward towards each other, sharing a kiss as sweet as the last time she said those words, but this one was filled with more love and acceptance.

Just then, Chloe’s phone rang, and they jumped apart in surprise at the sound. Chloe pulled out her phone and saw it was just a telemarketer. She looked up at Lucifer and smiled.

“Not this time,” she said as she switched her phone on silent and tossed it on the couch nearby. Lucifer smiled back and she stepped forward, throwing her arms around his neck and pulling him down into a deep and passionate kiss.

When they pulled back for air a few minutes later, their foreheads resting together, their eyes locked as they attempted to catch their breaths.

“I’d go through it all again if it meant I got to be here, in this moment, with you,” Lucifer breathed.

Chloe’s eyes fluttered shut. How could she be worth so much pain?

“I wish you didn’t have to go through so much to get here, and I’d take all of your suffering on if it meant it would ease your pain,” she said, opening her eyes back up.

Lucifer stared at her like she was the single greatest thing in the universe.

In his defence, to him, she was.

“I love you, Lucifer Morningstar, all of you.”

Lucifer let out a strangled sob.

“And I, you, Chloe Jane Decker. With everything that I am, I love you.”

Chloe pulled him back down into a kiss.

They stayed like that for a while.

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you liked it!  
> Again, would love to know what you thought in the comments!  
> And I always love to talk about theories and speculations about the Lucifer! I am very active on my Tumblr: Detectivedeckerstar (same as my ao3 name), and would love to discuss stuff more on there if you feel so inclined! If you do, send me a message letting me know your from this fic! I promise I'll see it and respond!  
> Anyway, hope you all have a good day and Lucifer Season 5b can't come quick enough!


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